I picked up Mulk Raj Anand's "Coolie" and read the last chapter (I don't remember if when I had earlier read it, I had gotten to the last chapter, but I found it a very strong book). This time, it was almost physically painful. In a confused chaotic time (before independance), with a bunch of people fighting for independance, another bunch of people getting onto the british gravy train and the vast majority suffering, this man managed to isolate the very core of the inhumanity and hypocrisy of the society and convey it in simple, straightforward and beautiful language. The critique is still relevant today, with a new set of actors replacing the british.

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It reminded me of when I read Kazuo Ishiguro's "The Remains of the Day". Such incredible writing, that left me with a physical stomach ache.

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I found my Pondicherry CD , "Pondy Groove" which I was quite upset at having lost. Listening to it now. I mentioned it earlier on the blogs somewhere. It is quite a striking fun CD. If you care about music you should take the effort to check them out. If you're interested drop me a note.

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Sometimes (like after reading Coolie just now), I get into this state of mind where I feel that I really *get* this thing called 'life' and I am above it all. And then when I get into the hurly-burly of daily life and interacting with people, the conviction all vanishes and I'm back to being complex and confused. The point is not "how to preserve the feeling even in quotidian life" but that the feeling is not strong enough and therefore not true enough.

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Jiddu Krishnamurthi once said that for all his decades of teaching he was not aware of a single person reaching enlightenment as a result of it. I was reaching a book on Buddhism by Osho and interestingly it had something to say about the Buddha on the same lines. It is a beautiful passage but unfortunately too long for me to transcribe fully. Here is the gist: The gods are upset because after he becomes enlightened, Buddha feels it is the right thing to speak about it. They come to the Buddha with this argument:

"We have found one single, small argument. It is very small in comparison to all the arguments that go against it, but still we would like you to consider. Our argument is that you may be misunderstood by ninety-nine percent of the people, but you cannot say that you will be misunderstood by a hundred percent of the people. You have to give at least a little margin -- just one percent. That one percent is not small in this vast universe, that one percent is a big enough portion. Perhaps out of that one percent few will be able to follow the path. But even if one person in the whole universe becomes enlightened because of your speaking, it will be worth it.. << some more >>"

The Buddha listens and accepts that it is worth it, and the book says that over the course of his 42 years of teaching about a dozen people were enlightened.

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I'm off to Delhi for a week on Sunday

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